I started thinking sometime in my late twenties about how a human being assimilates, processes and stores emotional pain… with the comparison of the human body and how it reacts to physical pain…

The human body…will bleed when cut too deep, bones break and our bodies tell us when we have an obvious breaking point.. We pass out when overcome with pain, our bodies simply say “no mas” the brain sends a signal to the body to shut down… and that is that… the pain ceases. More important of distinction, our bodies are almost all like this… sure, pain thresholds vary.. But when enough is enough, our brain shuts it down…almost as if we are hard wired with some sort of “guideline limit” with processing physical pain...

Our hearts on the other hand can undergo years and years of torment and trauma… and liken to a pain threshold; we have some differences in how much we can take…
Some of us will end a relationship, make a hard decision, leave a job, check into a mental hospital, etc, where others will simply stay put and stay miserable… They endure and accept the pain and say farewell to happiness…I think we all know at least one person who we know is morbidly depressed, and will do nothing to improve their situation.

Why?


Are we as human beings these finite, bounded, limited, circumscribed and restricted vessels that can only hold so much??? If I take this possibility, I paint with the somber tones that, I can only love so much, live so long, feel so much, and either endure or overcome only a certain amount of meaning in my life… regardless of my experiences…

Or

Are we as human beings measureless? Are our hearts, our love, and our possibilities to overcome boundless, without limit, vast and infinite??? I feel that’s precisely what we are… We are all uncomfortable with how much potential we have and how much opportunity lay before us… …. I read somewhere once that we are all uncomfortable with how much God loves us… as if in some way we feel as if we don’t deserve it…

I think the point I want to make is simply this;

We have to make room for the good stuff. Everyday. It’s not a matter of forgetting what we go through. I know I need to accept that my pain, my mistakes, my trespasses and all else brought me to this point. I know I can do nothing for my beginning, but I can and will control the direction of my ending…


The only thing limited to us that matters in this world is time… Love abounds, the power of your heart is measureless… don’t let anyone tell you its not. We are not only the abuse we’ve suffered, the things we’ve done or had done to us…If you are withholding forgiveness… give it, not so that the other party can walk away… Grant forgiveness so that you may walk forward. If you seek forgiveness do what you need to do to get your grief, guilt or heavy feelings to a more manageable place….

Make room for the good stuff…
Don’t wait too long…