Someone can most certainly shut you out of their life, they can throw you back out into the world on your own, and they can remove themselves completely and totally from your proximity… With them no longer around to look out for you, not around to talk to, to share with, to feel anything with…

I ask myself what am I left with? What is it exactly… that I should have learned from this experience? Where precisely is the meaning which I will draw strength and wisdom from? And why pray tell is the answer taking so long to come to fruition?

Most of all I ask myself this… why can’t I get past myself, and just accept that whatever has happened, has happened for reasons that are outside of my control…

Did I really try as much as I could?

Also, still desperately clinging to the notion to absorb totally the brunt of the relationship’s problems… and in some dark wound lay the question of what is it, whether inside or outside of me, that she wishes was different ?

Somewhere in the madness of still deeply wanting what you can no longer have, I find comfort in a meditative thought of knowing that no one can ever take away from me the joy I have singing in my heart and soul, the same joy that clings to the memories I choose to hold onto…

No one can ever take that away from me…


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I can taste your kiss on my lips
And I’m wrapped around your finger tips
As I watch the moonlight dancing on your skin
Your green eyes and the sweet red wine
Go to my head girl every time
And I get drunk on you
I lose control and then
And here I go again
I’m falling for you even though I know your only playing with my heart
Tomorrow might be hell
But a night or two of loving you is better than never at all
And I can’t help myself
So I’ll just hold on
I’ll just hold on
I’ll just hold on
Until your gone
Girl I know you’re a gypsy soul
And I’m just a stop along your road
And you hang around long enough to blow my mind
If I had a star for every scar
You tattooed on my heart
I could fill up the Oklahoma sky
So girl I don’t know why
I’m falling for you even though I know your only playing with my heart
Tomorrow might be hell
But a night or two of loving you is better than never at all
And I can’t help myself
So I’ll just hold on
I’ll just hold on
I’ll just hold on
Until your gone
I’ll just hold on
I’ll just hold on
I’ll just hold on
Till your gone
I look down at my cell phone ringin'
I see your name and I know what that means
But I don’t care
I’ll just hold on
Till your gone
Every time you leave I take it hard
Seeing you go just breaks my heart
But don’t care
I’ll just hold on
Till your gone
Your green eyes and that sweet red wine
Go to my head girl every time
But I don’t care
I’ll just hold on
Till your gone

I'll Just Hold On by Blake Shelton